The Unknown

Shortly after Troy came to live with us I received multiple emails and phone calls from his teachers and counselors at school letting me know about his behavior. Troy is by no means an aggressive child, but he use to refuse doing school work. He turned in test blank, didn't complete homework, refused to participate in class, and refused to follow simple directions. This child is in all honors classes and test in the top 10% in pre test for each course at the beginning of the school year. He is a smart child! He is a smart child with emotional baggage. Baggage we didn't foresee or know how to handle. Together we are getting a handle on it. When he gets pushed into a corner or is told to complete a task that he just doesn't want to do he shuts down.
The first time I was called to school he was at football. He refused to dress out for a football game and wouldn't speak to anyone. Not friends, teachers, coaches, or me. He looked as if he were inside a shell. His face was blank, he refused to look at anyone and occasionally a tear fell. The very first time I remember sitting in the car at the football game with him and trying everything to get him to talk. If he only knew how much I wished to help him. It was so frustrating spilling my guts to him and pleading that I'm here to help him and he wouldn't respond. He stayed silent for 3 long days!
The second time I was called to school I walked into a full principals office. The counselor, social worker, resource officer, and principal were all there worried sick. He had gone silent again. We found out through a few kids that were called out of class that he was in PE and he didn't want to workout. The coach approached him and he didn't respond.  He just sat there blank and silent.The counselors suggested I send him to a mental hospital to get evaluated and medicated if he did this again. I was clueless as to why he was acting this way. He acts totally fine at home. He gets along well with everyone and often smiles and laughs.  
After many nights crying from frustration I reached out to friends and family to get some suggestions. A wise woman told me, "you don't need to fix him, you just need to be there for him." That comment runs through my mind pretty often. I've learned I can't make him better but I can make him feel loved. That's my job! He has been with us for 9 months now and we've only had two silent episodes. He has gotten a lot better with completing his school work and is slowly opening up. I'm very proud of our progress and look forward to next school year but for now I will just love and support all my children because they deserve it!